What you didn't see
by gabbyromig
Summary: This is going to be a group of one shots where I wrap things up from either my own fanfictions or from the show. I will come up with some on my own but the amount of chapters I write depends on the reviews and suggestions I get. Can include all characters just don't ask me to do any Brallie, sorry it wont happen.
1. Chapter 1

**Based off of one shot: Security and protection**

Stef

She tossed and turned in her sleep signalling her fifth nightmare tonight. I grabbed her and held her close.

"Shh it's ok, love. It's all over now" i whispered into her ear but she still tossed and turned in my arms and moaned in distress. She jolted awake fear written in her eyes. Tears streamed down her face and she buried her head in my chest. This is the fifth time it's happen tonight.

"It's ok honey" i said as she cried into my shoulder silently. I wish i could take away these nightmares from her.

"He shot me… thats what keeps happening in my nightmares he shoots me" she said gripping onto my shirt. I have never seen my wife so vulnerable and i never wanted to. It brings tears to my own eyes but i didn't dare cry, she needs me to be strong for her right now.

"It's ok sweetie he can't hurt you" i said trying desperately to figure out how to help her.

"I love you" she said kissing me.

"I love you too, so much" I said and kissed her again.

After we pulled apart she laid her head on my chest and i kissed her head three times. It wasn't long before Jude came in.

"Hey kiddo, you ok" i said in a whisper noticing Lena is sleeping peacefully for once tonight. I have yet to sleep tonight but i will gladly give up my sleep so everyone else can feel safe enough to sleep… after all it's also my job.

"I couldn't sleep" he admitted still standing awkwardly by the door.

"Yeah you're not the only one… come here" i said patting the bed next to me. He hesitated but eventually joined me.

"Is she ok?" he asked looking at Lena.

"Yeah she's a little freaked out but with time she will be back to her old self…" i started and he looked confused.

"Who was that guy? Why did he want to hurt mama?" he asked and his maturity passed his years tone faded into a scared and worried childs voice.

"I don't know buddy. All i know is that he is behind bars and he can't hurt Mama ever again. We are all safe and you know i would do anything to keep it that way right?" i said and he nodded.

"Good now try to get some sleep" i said and he turned on his side and fell asleep.

Mariana

I know sleep is pointless tonight, i have tried sleeping for about two hours and it still hasn't happened. I can't be the only one. I got out of bed and went passed what i think is Callie sleeping but i think she is awake with her thoughts too. I left the room and went into Jesus room and found him awake and Jude gone.

"Hey wheres Jude?" i asked sitting on his bed.

"Moms room… couldn't sleep either?" he asked taking his headphones off and leaning against the wall.

"Yeah just couldn't stop thinking about last night" i said and he sat up. " I was so worried that we would lose her… she was held at gunpoint." i said remembering hearing Mike say for him to drop the gun.

"Yeah lets just be thankful we went to the station afterwards instead of the hospital. Having one of our moms shot was bad enough" he said.

"Who was that guy why would he want to hurt her?" i asked.

"I don't know but he was arrested, the asshole can't hurt any of us anymore" he promised.

"I was just so scared…" i said and he put his arm around my shoulder.

"So was i" he admitted.

Lena

Stef brought over a cup of coffee for me and handed it to me. I tried my best to steady my hand so I don't spill it on me. she noticed this and pulled me into the next room.

"Honey you are shaking like a chihuahua" she said and took my hands in hers.

"It's ok… you're safe" she said playing with my ring. I still don't feel safe. I still feel like he's watching me, following me. I know i sound crazy but i still feel like it's not over.

"Hey, talk to me" she said sitting down and i joined her. " I just…" i started. I know she is doing everything humanly possible to make me and the kids feel safe. I know she didn't sleep at all last night.

"Don't feel safe?" she asked and i can see part of her blames herself for that.

"Yes but you are certainly making me feel safer" i said leaning against her and i know she can feel me shaking.

"Clearly not enough… you should never of even been in that situation." she said getting mad at herself.

"Stephanie… listen to me. Thats not your fault…. you saved me yesterday. You're my hero" i said kissing her.

"I should have known that something was wrong. You haven't been yourself. Who was that man?" she asked.

"Just some guy i met through the school… he was awkward around me from the beginning and soon he began to ask me out all the time and i kept rejecting him. I soon noticed him following me…" i said and she looked shocked.

"Honey why wouldn't you say something? Thats stalking… did he hurt you?" she asked and i looked down.

Stef

I can't believe Lena wouldn't come to me and tell me. Obviously this creep has been making her feel unsafe for a while and she didn't think to tell me. If she would of just told me this yesterday could have been a lot easier, so why she not tell me. Did he hurt her or threaten her or something?

"No… he just…" she said looking down and i could tell she was lying. I grabbed her hand and squeezed it hoping to help her feel safer. I know i'm not making her feel safe enough and i need to figure out how to change that.

"Honey he can't hurt you, ok i promise" i said.

"He grabbed my arm a little hard yesterday morning and i called you immediately after. " she said and i felt guilty. I was so busy yesterday that i never even thought to check my phone and of all days she really needs to get in touch with me .

"Honey… I'm so sorry i was busy i called you as soon as i could. Thats the only time it happened, right?" i said .

"Yes it is… before that i thought he was just persistent" she explained.

"Honey if someone is making you uncomfortable you tell me about it ok?" she nodded and i hugged her. I could still feel her shaking against me.

"You know i would do anything to protect you right?" i asked. I could kill that bastard for hurting her but i know it's best not to say that.

"I know… they are probably worried about us" she said nodding towards the kitchen. We went into join them and i dismissed their concerned looks. I sat closer to Lena than i normally do and put my one hand on her leg and she smiled .

"So I'm going into work soon and i will fill out the report so don't worry about it" Mike announced and it was great to hear. I never even thought of the report but i'm thankful i don't have to leave my family even for a little bit. I didn't even think to call in this morning to explain what happened.

"Thank you i totally forgot and forgot about calling that in" i responded.

"I called it in yesterday night, no one is expecting you at work for a few days. Which means don't show up" he said the last sentence as a command.

"Thanks trust me i appreciate that a lot" i said glad that my family doesn't have to leave the house after that. He gave me a 'You ok?' look and i forced a smile and nodded my head in response.

Jude

I was so worried and scared last night. I didn't know what was going on other than that someone wanted to hurt mama. I didn't want to lose her, i didn't want to lose another mom. I felt the same way i did after Stef was shot.

Everybodys on edge and i know Mom is doing everything to make sure everyone is ok. Nobody is making sure she's ok. I'm sure seeing your wife almost get shot, especially after she was herself, is well upsetting for lack of a better word.

I walked up and hugged her and she looked shocked for a bit.

"Hey buddy, you ok?" she asked.

"Fine, are you ok?" i asked and she looked like she was going to cry for a second and then she put on a brave face. I recognize that so much. She did it at her dad's funeral and Callie does it all the time. Her and Callie are a lot a like.

"Yeah i'm fine" she said and Callie always does the same thing.

"No you're not" i said and she looked taken aback by my response.

"Did you sleep last night, you look exhausted. Maybe you should take a nap" i suggested.

"Honey, i'm fine don't worry about me" she said smiling at me and then leaving. Her and Callie are too much a like.

Stef

Jude always warms my heart. He such a sweetheart, he kind of reminds me of Lena. He is observant, even when i really wish he wouldn't be, and always seems to notice the things i'm trying to keep everyone else from seeing. I can get through the day without breaking down and making sure everybody is safe and happy as long nobody ask me if i'm ok. As soon as the question is asked it takes so much control to not break down. I know my family is safe, that he is in custody, but it's still my job to keep everyone safe and i can't do that i let my emotions win right now. Yesterday my emotions took control and i froze and that freeze could have cost my wife her life. Thankfully Mike was there. The thank you this morning was more than just doing the report for me and i'm pretty sure he knows that.

She called me a hero and i know i'm not. Sure i got her out of that yesterday but i hesitated and if it wasn't for Mike he could have shot her. I'm her wife i was the one who should have protected her. Hell i should have known something was wrong and protected her before it even happened.

My phone rang bringing me back from my thoughts and i was grateful for that. Mike, please let this be good news.

"Bad news first" I commanded giving my family a 'everythings fine' look.

"I don't have bad news… He is being trialed for stalking and attempted murder so he's looking at at least 25 years.'

"Ok thats good atleast' i said.

"Ok so i lied earlier… i do have some bad news" he said slowly as if he knew i had to walk out of the room my family is in.

"What?" i asked steeling myself.

"We need Lena to come down to the station since she was in shock and didn't say anything yesterday and you both need to testify at court" i knew that was coming so at least it's not new bad news.

"Ok we can handle that… does she need to come right now? And do you know who is going to be handling that?" i asked. I know it's not allowed for me or Mike to since we both know her personally, and i would like to know who will be doing it.

"Don't know but i do know they all know better than to make her uncomfortable since you scare most of them." he said and i rolled my eyes.

"aww thank you… listen i need someone here with the kids and i need to be with her" i said.

"Already on my way" he said and i was surprised at how ahead of me he is.

"Ok thank you" i said confused and hung up.

I went over to Lena and sat next to her taking her hand.

"Hey baby you ok?" i asked and she gave me a fake smile.

"Listen i need to take you back to the station to answer some questions" i said cautiously.

"Didn't she do that yesterday?" Brandon asked and Lena looked confused.

"I did?"

"No they couldn't get her to answer since she was in shock so she has to do it today" i said and she looked surprised.

"I was?" she asked. "I don't even remember going anywhere afterwards we went right to sleep"

"No honey that was a couple of hours later… you were in shock" i said kissing her head.

"Mike is on his way to come watch you guys… we shouldn't be gone long but don't give him any problems." i said and they nodded. Mike knocked on the door .

"Thank you" i said knowing that even though they are required to send a cop down here it didn't need to be Mike and appreciate that it's a cop they know and i trust.

"Yeah of course"

We came in and i grabbed Captain.

"Just give me a second honey" i said and walked away a bit.

"Whose set up on her case?"

"Jack why?" she said. Jack isn't bad.

"Just wondering" i said and when Jack got ready to interview her i came up to him.

"Hey it's weird to see you out of uniform" he commented.

"Yeah listen I need you to be…"

"I know Stef… I will be patient with her. I don't exactly want to be on your bad side." he commented. He's only been here for a couple of years so he remembers dealing with me when he was a rookie. I have trust issues, i've seen too much not to, so the rookies have to deal with me constantly on defence and proving that they don't want to mess with me for a while before i trust them.

"Yeah i have to be a bitch to get that point across" i said keeping my eyes on poor Lena who doesn't really know what to do. Yesterday she just hung by me the entire time.

"Yeah you were… but hey you're not that bad now" he said and i rolled my eyes. Anybody here younger than me knows that it's takes a lot to gain my trust but once you got it i will always have your back.

I walked back over to Lena rubbing her back. Everybody watched me and Lena together and i rolled my eyes.

"He's a friend of mine and i will be right out here if you need me" i said kissing her. I know everyone is watching us so knowing Lena won't see it i flipped them all off. Jack chuckled to himself and then lead her to the interviewing room.

"You alright?" David asked.

"Yeah just picking the pieces back up" i said sitting in my usual seat.

"No working" Captain said seriously to me. Thats the first time i've ever heard her say that.

"Well thats the first time i heard her say that"

"Yeah really." i said jokingly.

"Well you two are very cute together" Kyle said.

"Yeah it's like a completely different you when you are out of uniform and you're wife is around" David said.

"I hate you guys" i said laughing. My co-workers are like a second family so i was expecting the teasing. Just like any family there are the ones you like and ones you don't like so much but still have to put up with. My best friend here is David the slightly flamboyant gay boy who being the only other out gay person in the station means we had to become best friends immediately. I didn't have a choice in the matter to be honest but oh well he's grown on me.

She walked out and she gave me a half smile.

"Hey sweetie" i said getting up to join her side. I gave Jack a questioning glare and he just nodded. I know that he would do his best to make her comfortable.  
"You ok, love?" I asked.

"Yeah i'm fine, ready to go home" she said leaning against me. We left after saying goodbye and walked to the car. I opened the door for her.

"Hey how are you really?" i asked taking her hand once one were in the car. She shrugged.

"I'm fine… just a couple of questions you know" she said trying to play it off like it was nothing.

"Honey!"

She looked down and sighed,"God… how stupid am i?"

"Honey you are not stupid… why would you even think that?" I said taking her into a hug.

"Because… none of this would have happened if i would have told you about it" she said and i can't really argue with that logic.

"Love, a lot of people don't realize that it's a problem until it's too late. Yes you should have told me but you couldn't have known it would get so bad so quick. Just promise me something?" i asked and she nodded.

"If anyone ever makes you feel uncomfortable again, tell me as soon as possible. Even if you don't think it's a big deal" i said and she nodded. There's a good chance if someone makes her uncomfortable it's a big deal.

We drove back in silence as she held tightly to my hand.

"Hey you're back… everything go ok?" he asks once we are alone.

"Yeah and i can handle it from here… thank you" i said and he laughed content with himself.

"I knew it was killing you to have to rely on me again" he said and i rolled my eyes.

"You're an ass, I knew you were…"

"No Stephanie you know i'm not that much of an asshole. I just wanted to make sure you and your family were taken care of during a time like this" he said.

"Don't full name me!" I said.

"It's ok to need someone…" he said and i went to leave.

"Really?" he said annoyed. I turned back around to him.

"You look like you rose from your grave" he said and i just looked at him surprised. Yeah he's not an asshole or anything.

"Oh thank you… you were always a charmer" i said sarcastically.

"You didn't sleep at all last night, did you? You're raccoon eyes really make that obvious. You know you're a pretty good actress, but you can't keep it up forever. Sorry for trying to help you not crack in front of your family" he said walking back into the house. I hate when he does that. He could never tell my emotions when i wanted him to but hell he can read my mind when i don't want him to.

I sat down on the porch feeling my control slip. A tear ran down my face as the thought of Lena being held at gun shot filled my head. I can still see the fear in her eyes, can still fear her shaking against me. I might have kept him from shooting her but i still can't say i keep my promise to keep her safe. If i would have just opened my eyes and realized something was wrong with her before this it never would have happened. Besides i froze up, if it wasn't for Mike she might have been died by now.

I heard the door open and someone walk out and tried to stop myself but i was crying to hysterically by now. Brandon sat next to me.

"Hey dad told me i should probably check on you" he said noticing that i was crying.

"I'm fine… just needed some fresh air" i said and my voice cracked.

"I can see that" he said a little awkwardly. "You know i disagree with dad you're not a good actress" I laughed.

"Are you eavesdropping on our conversation?" he shrugged.

"You're trying to make sure that everyone else is ok…"

"Please don't go all therapist on me… I know i'm not ok don't give me a lecture on it you're father already did that" i complained and he laughed. He looked at me with a look like 'talk'.

"I froze up… when i first entered the house. You're dad was the one who had control over the situation. That guy could have shot you're mom immediately if it wasn't for him." i admitted.

"Dad told me you were the one who got her out of danger" he said. "Froze up or not you're the one who saved her life. Nothing else matters to her" I smiled and hugged him.

"Thanks" he just nodded.

He's right all that matters is everyone is safe. I walked back in and hugged Lena just glad that i can still do that.

**Hey hope you like it. Leave suggestions of things you thought weren't wrapped up right in one of my stories or on the show. **


	2. Chapter 2 the baby

**Based off of the season finale and the baby drama in general. Hope you like it.**

Lena

I didn't know how to react. Part of me was thrilled. How could i not be? I'm pregnant! This is what i wanted to have a baby… a baby with Stef, though.

"I don't want you to have a baby, Lena" her words echoed in my ears. I don't want to do this without her. I can't do this without her. Yet i still feel like i'm going in on this alone.

Stef

'I can't believe this' i thought smiling to myself as i drove to the court. Today i get to finally be Callie and Judes adoptive mom. When i walked in my house that day to find a strange teenaged girl i didn't know in my kitchen i never thought her, let alone her little brother i didn't even knew existed yet, would soon be the next members of our family.

I walked in and saw my family sitting there. I walked over to Jude and Callie. I didn't know just how much i would love this troubled teenager and her cute little brother.

"This is exciting" i said. "hey babies"

"Can we talk" Lena asked. I know there is so much that we need to talk about. What is going to happen with Brandon? What happened with Anna? Mostly though about the baby situation. I know i hurt her feelings yesterday... but a baby? The very thought of it makes my head spin. How could we possibly handle a baby with five teenagers?

Lena

We need to talk about so much but i'm still nervous to talk to her about the real thing that has us tense later tonight.

"Do we need to find a new school for Brandon?" Stef asked pulling me back from my thoughts.

"No but…"

"But what thats good…" she said and i began to rant about the Veko situation to try and keep myself from worrying.

"So how did everything go with Ana?" I asked after finishing the rant.

"She wasn't there… guess I have to wait till she shows up again" she said and i only listened to about half of what she was saying. Once she was done talking the awkwardness returned.

"Listen are we ok? I know I said somethings that hurt your feelings yesterday." she said and i shifted uncomfortably. Great now i'm going to have to tell her here in public.

"Well i thought about what you said and i think you are right… our kids need us right now" i said and she took my hand.

"It's just…" I said feeling even more nervous. "I heard back from Urgent Care and I didn't get my period it was just spotting ...cause I'm pregnant" I said trying to read her expression. I can't tell what she's thinking by her expression through. At first she just looked shocked but soon after she smiled and faked laughed, pulling her bottom lip into her mouth and shaking her head. I knew this was going to happen she's already said that she doesn't want a baby. I truly am alone.

Stef

I could tell something was wrong by how she walked. When she's nervous she always walks with her back completely straight and rigid. I also could tell that she was a bit distracted and wasn't really listening when i was talking. The second she said, "It's just…" i knew i had to try and keep my face as expressionless as possible.

I didn't know how to react when she said she was pregnant. I didn't think i was going to feel so much love. I can't believe it, my wife is expecting our baby! I know we will figure everything out, we always will.

"I didn't think when you said that that i would feel… well i didn't know what i would feel but all i feel is love" i said hugging and kissing her. She sighed of relief and i realized how afraid she had to of been. Yesterday i told her i didn't want her to have a baby of course she would be afraid for my reaction.

"Love for you and love for this beautiful baby we are going to have." i said and felt her relax against me.

Lena

I can't explain how relieved i feel. She pulled away from the hug and put her hands on either side of my face.

"Oh my god" she said and i can tell she is really happy.

Callie

I did my best to keep the tears from my eyes as i told Jude to get adopted. He needs to get adopted thats what we have been waiting for forever. This is a good family and he is part of it.

I watched as he signs the paper a smile on my face. Ritas words still in my head.

*"The universe isn't against you the truth is it isn't against anyone thats just not how it works." Maybe she's right, maybe this actually will sort itself out and I will have a normal life again for the first time since before my moms death.

After the party was all over i was sitting in my room writing about the day when STef and Lena walked in.

"Hey sweets can we talk to you?" Stef said and so Mariana wouldn't have to leave our room i went with them to their room.

"What's up?" i said once in her room.

"We just wanted to talk to you about today make sure you're alright" Lena said.

"I'm ok" i said.

"Callie you are a part of this family you might not be officially adopted yet but you will be" Lena said and i smiled.

"I know… you guys are my moms nothing can change that" i said and i truly believe it.

"You're right and we are both so proud that you are our daughter" Stef said.

"We love you so much" Lena said.

"I love you too, moms" i said smiling at them.

"You know what you need?" Stef asked. "A mama sandwich" They both hugged me and i laughed.

Stef

Callie left and i turned around to Lena taking a step closer to her.

"It's been a crazy day" i commented taking her in my arms and resting our foreheads together.

"It has" she agrees. I kissed her.

"I love you" I said leading her to the bed. She smiled at me with tears in her eyes.

'What's wrong?"I asked wiping the tear away.

"I thought that you might not react well and that i might be going into this alone and i can't do this alone" she said tears racing down her cheeks now.

"Honey you aren't going into this alone. You never have to go into anything alone, i'm always here for you. This baby is ours, not yours and Timothys, ours." i said kissing her gently.

We got ready for bed and crawled into bed.

"Can I?" i said after turning around to her.

"What?' she asked and i laughed.

I put my hand over her stomach and kiss it. She laughed awkwardly not used to it.

"Hey baby" i said. "I love you so much and i will do anything to protect you"

I went up and kissed Lena again.

"Youll get used to it,it's always a bit weird at first" i said kissing her again.

"I love you"

"come here" i said and she laid her head on my chest. I rubbed her back and watched as she drifted off to sleep. I can't believe all that happened today. We adopted Jude and now we know that Lena is pregnant. I kissed her forehead three times and then drifted off to sleep.

The next morning I woke up before Lena. I watched as she slowly woke up and looked up at me.

"Hey sleeping beauty" i said.

"Hey" she said sleepily closing her eyes again. We both have today off so we don't have to get up right away. Which we both appreciate.

We came downstairs once we both got up. Lena yawned and i felt bad making coffee since today is the first time she can't have any. I poured Lena some orange juice and gave it to her.

"I'll make breakfast just relax" i said kissing her and the kids started to come downstairs.

We were sitting eating pancakes when Jude who is definitely the most observant of our kids noticed something off.

"Hey why aren't you guys drinking coffee today?" he observed.

"You can have some" Lena said.

"Well we were planning on telling guys tonight" i said getting everybodys attention.

"Oh my god are you pregnant?" Mariana asked and before Lena could respond Mariana hugged her.

"Yes mama is pregnant" i confirmed.

After many hugs were exchanged and a bunch of congratulations we continued eating breakfast everybody talking excitedly about the baby. I took advantage of it and made myself some coffee.

Being the weekend everyone was going some where and by one in the afternoon it was just me and Lena. I can tell she's tired since she didn't have her coffee this morning and I know today is the first day of many.

"Take a nap, honey" i suggested but she shook her head no.

"I'm good, i guess i'm going to have to get used to being tired" she said and i asked if she was sure and she nodded.

"Alright go put in a movie i'll make popcorn" i said knowing she will end up falling asleep on me.

We were half way though the movie when i looked down and noticed that Lena was asleep on me. I grabbed the blanket from above our heads and put it around her shoulder. She snuggled in closer to me and i put the popcorn on the table.

Lena

A couple of days later was my first appointment and even though i don't want to admit it i'm nervous. Admit it or not i can tell Stef notices. She put her hand on my leg to try and relax me.

"It's ok… everythings going to be fine and we are going to get to see our healthy little baby" she said and i smiled.

"Why are you so good at calming me down?" i asked taking her hand.

"Cause i remember being in the same situation" she said.

I looked at the screen a smile and tears in my eyes as the sound of my babys heart beat fills the room. Stef had tears in her eyes too as her eyes were trained on the screen. She kissed my cheek and never let go of my hand.

"I love you and this baby so much" she said.

"I love you too" i said to Stef before kissing her.

"The baby's healthy right?" i asked just to make sure.

"Yes you're baby is perfectly healthy... congratulations.I'll print some pictures for you two and you're family" she said.

"Thank you" Stef said for me.

"We are going to have a baby, we are actually going to have a baby" Stef said before i could. She kissed me again.

"Thank you so much for doing this with me" i said feeling tears roll down my cheeks. I know i hurt her trying to have a baby and i should have gone about it a different way but i'm so glad this happening now.

"I wouldn't want to do it with anyone else" she said as we both looked back at our baby.


	3. Chapter 3 no regrets

Stef

I sat on the porch numb at what just happened. There's no way i just walked into find my dad dead, right? I called 911 and they are on there way here now. Part of me felt like i should wait inside with him, but i just can't. I feel like a terrible daughter for leaving him in there alone.

Without thinking of it i got out my phone and called Lena.

"Hey where are you?" she asked concerned. The last thing we did was fight, fight about that stupid car.

"My dad's house" i said. "I just found him dead"

"What? O my god, honey. I'm on my way" she said forgetting we only have one working car right now and i have it.

"We only have one car" i reminded her.

"Damn it" she said.

"Can you just stay on the phone with me?" i asked.

"Of course… sweetie i'm right here" she said.

Lena'

I knew something was wrong when she called me because her voice sounded like she was about to cry. I sat there on the phone with her for a few minutes neither of us saying anything.

"The paramedics are here, i'll see you at home" she said and hung up. I looked down at the phone just wishing she is going to be ok. I wish i could have been there for her. I hate the idea of her being alone.

Stef

I walked over to the paramedics.

"Hey are you Stephanie Foster? The one that called" he asked and i nodded.

"Yes… he's in the living room. Just past the kitchen" i said and he nodded.

"Thank you… and i'm so sorry for your loss" he said and i forced a smile.

When they came out with him in the body bag was when i really wish Lena was here. He still looked alive when he was in the chair. He looked like he just fell asleep in front of the game like he did so many times. I remember as a child he would fall asleep in front of the t.v and i would see how many legos i could stack on his head before he woke up. My record was ten. When i found him, he looked like he could wake up any second. Like i could only get a few legos before he would wake up and grab me making me laugh.

I texted Lena before leaving his house.

Me: hey heading home now

Her: ok babe can't wait til you get home

I put the phone in my pocket and went home. When i got home she was sitting on the porch. She got up and walked towards me when i put the car in park. I got out and was immediately pulled into her arms.

"You ok?" she asked and i tried to keep my tears at bay.

"Yeah" i said but my voice cracked. She pulled away and whipped away the tear under my left eye.

"Come on lets go inside" she said and grabbed my hand. We walked over to the porch and she grabbed the glass of wine she had poured, based on the fact that she didn't even have a sip of it, for me.

We sat on the couch and she grabbed my hand.

"I'm here when you want to talk" she said and I looked over at her.

"Did you tell the kids" I asked and she shook her head-no.

"No I figured we will tell them together tomorrow" she said and I shook my head.

"Im sorry I got mad at you" I said and she looked at me shocked.

"Oh honey. Forget about it. That's not important"

"He looked like he was sleeping" I admitted and she put her arm around my shoulder.

"He was always so stubborn." i said. "I just wanted to talk to him"

"i know babe. I'm so sorry." she said and i took a long sip of the wine finishing the glass.

"Come on lets go upstairs" she said grabbing my hand and leading me upstairs. She spooned me and we both laid silently until we fell asleep.

I woke suddenly from the dream and laid there thinking back on it. For some reason the snow was the thing that brought tears to my eyes.

"Bad dream?" Lena asked as i jumped at her voice.

"Sorry didn't mean to scare you"she said leaning above me. She kissed my cheek.

"How did i wake you?" i asked. She's normally not a very light-sleeper and i didn't move much or make a lot of noise.

"I felt you jolt awake" she said and i turned to face her.

"What was your dream about?" she asked sitting up and i did the same.

"Nothing" i said and she looked over at me.

She sighed,"Babe you need too talk to me"

"It was stupid" i said.

"It's not stupid… tell me about it." she said insistent.

Sighing in surrender i said,"When i was six me and my dad went out too my first game i ever saw live and it started to snow. It was the first time i ever saw snow so i didn't know what it was. I asked him why the sky was dusty" i laughed sadly and she smiled at me.

"Anyways he teased me about it and in the dream when i went too talk too him i found him in the same spot i found him yesterday. His chair in front of the t.v. the game turned on. I woke him up and we talked about that and it started to snow and then he was gone" i said and she held my hand.

"Silly, i know" i said and she shook her head.

'No baby it's not stupid. Ok?" i nodded. "You know i'm always here to listen right?"

"Yeah" i said and she kissed me.

"Good… lets try to go back to sleep." she said and we both drifted back to sleep in the same position we were before.

Lena

Today is Franks funeral and I'm going to keep an eye on her and make sure she's ok.

"I know today is not going to be easy for you so anything you want" i said.

"I'm fine love i'm fine" she says that a lot and most of the time she's not fine.

"I know you'll fine i just know you are upset you didn't get too talk too you're dad" i said.

"You know it is what it is" she responded. "Thats life i guess...I don't have any regrets"

I sat next to her and put my hand on top of hers hoping to give her some comfort though this. After all it is her fathers funeral. She slid her hand away from mine making me worried.

"Hey you alright" I whispered to her and she nodded.

"Yeah fine" she said distracted. She didn't say anything about her sliding her hand away from mine so i dismissed it. A lot of her family from her dad's side is here and she's probably not comfortable showing even the slightest affection right now. She doesn't talk about them that much but i'm going to assume that they are more conservative.

An older lady walked up to her and Stef smiled at her.

"Sharon darling" the lady said and Stef didn't even react to being called her moms name.

"Hey Lisa, how are you?" she said and Lisa looked around confused.

"Wheres Stephanie?" she said and Stef just continued to smile politely.

"Oh Frank has her" she said as if it was completely normal thing to say. Lisa has too have dementia or alzheimer's.

"I raised that son of a bitch he ain't know a thing about children i wouldn't trust him with her i was you" she said and Stef bite her lip to keep herself from laughing.

"I assure you Stef is perfectly capable of babysitting him" she joked and Lisa laughed.

"Yeah i ain't worry about Stefie it's Frank that i worry about. He's just like his dad i left Frank with him one time when he was young and the asshole fell asleep in front of the tv. Frank almost fell down the stairs, could have killed himself. I never did it again. Speaking of my husband have you seen him?" she asked Stef just shook her head, no. Lisa left to find her husband.

"That you're Gram?" i asked once Stef sat back down.

"Yeah she's been getting really bad lately. She thinks it's like 30 some years ago. She thinks i'm my mom and keeps asking me where my two year old daughter is. She doesn't understand that her son passed away or her husband who passed away almost ten years ago for the matter." Stef said sadly.

"I'm sorry why didn't you tell me?" i said and Stef just shrugged.

"I wasn't that close to her when i grew up only saw her every once in a while because her and my dad didn't get along" she said.

"Yeah and it's so weird to hear her swear" Sharon said from the other side of Stef.

"Yeah she never used too" stef said. I haven't seen any of my family deal with dementia or alzheimer's so it was weird too see.

"Who takes care of her?" Sharon asked.

"I think it is one of my aunts. My dad's youngest sister" she said making it obvious that she doesn't know much of her family from her dad's side.

"Oh Marie? Wow well i hope she kicked her drug problem first" Sharon said. She obviously knows more of Stefs family than Stef does.

"She had a drug problem?" Stef asked.

"God i hope so either that or she was just stupid' Sharon said and Stef shed her.

"Mom!"

"Sorry it's true"

"Can everyone take their seats…"

Once the ceremony was done Lisa came back up to us.

"I just can't believe Frank… sleeping in a ceremony like that" Lisa said and Stef smiled sadly. Lisa hugged Stef and then whispered in stefs ear loud enough for me to hear her.

"Whos the nigger behind you?" Sharon told me not too listen too her.

"Mom…" A woman i'm going to assume is Stefs aunt Marie came up behind her.

"How many times have we talked about this. You can't use the N word in public" she said.

"Every time i do it" Lisa mouthed off. Like an upset child sassing there mom.

"I'm sorry about her she's not thinking right" she said too me and i just smiled and dismissed it. Marie left with her mom following her.

"I'm so sorry" Stef said embarrassed.

"Don't worry about it"

"Well somethings don't change" Sharon remarked.

Stef

I sat in the car and watched as the snow fell and Lena got into the car. How did things get so messed up with us? She's trying too get pregnant and she didn't even tell me about it. Isn't that something you would by your wife first. What was she expecting too do, just one day tell me she's pregnant and thats she's been trying for a while and me just randomly jump for joy.

"It's snowing" she said. I thought back to watching her with the baby a little bit ago. 'She never got too have a baby' i realized. I thought back on Brandons early years. His first word, first time he walked, all of those moments she's didn't get too have. How can i ask her to give that up.

"So you want to have a baby?" i asked and she looked at me shocked.

"You're not good at hiding things i found you're pills" i admitted and she sighed.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have kept it from you" she said and i smiled.

"Well you're right about that. At first i was confused and mad but i remembered all the memories you don't have." i said and she kissed me.

"I love you" she said.

"I love you too" i said. "Can we try talking about things first though?"

"Yeah… i'm sorry. Are you ok?" she said looking at me.

"Just a long day" i said and she kissed me again.

"Come on lets go inside" she said and we walked inside. We continued to listen too Brandon play the piano as she massaged my shoulders. I smiled looking around the house. My dad might never of approved of my family and it might have drove a wedge between us but i'm so glad i made the choices i did. After all it gave me the amazing family i have today. I have no regrets and i guess thats the best way to live life.

**So i don't know if i like it but it seems when i don't think it's that good you guys love it. So i decided too put it up because someone might like it. Either way let me know what you think. And sorry about my absence lately i have so much going on right now but summer starts next friday for me and i will have way too much free time too write for you guys.**


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